My 24 Week Afterthought

I know it's absolutely horrible of me to think of this pregnancy and baby as an afterthought, but to be honest, that's about what it is right now. There are times I even forget that I'm pregnant (then I walk by a mirror....reality check). Of course I don't know how that could be when my dear husband reminds me multiple times a day that "holy crap, you have a baby in there!" The remarkable part about it is that he's still alive to remind me at all. Especially after one of our recent trips to my parent's house in the miserable, freezing cold, slushy winter, when we passed a dairy farm and I (obviously not thinking) remarked about how it would suck to be a cow (thinking of them having to stand out in the elements all day, every day). I'll give him credit, he did manage to last about 15 seconds before I heard the "snicker, snicker, snort" coming from the driver's seat. Cute.

I think the reason this pregnancy has been an afterthought is because, to be honest, it's number 2. I've always heard the stories about how after the first, it's no big deal. My mom even has proof of that: I have a 4 inch thick baby book, Kerry has a calendar with stickers of her "firsts", and Andrew has a shoebox, which may or may not still contain his hospital onesie. Hey, it happens, right? After how obsessive I was with my first pregnancy though, I never saw it happening to me. With Greyden I spent HOURS pouring over blogs, books, and message boards making sure that I knew everything there was to know, from what I needed to buy (including the best brands) to how to do everything exactly right (like licking your baby to bond with them, anyone remember that???). I couldn't even buy a crib sheet without hours of research, I mean, what if the elastic wasn't all the way around it? It could slip off the mattress! It (okay, I) was insane. Anytime I had even the slightest twinge or itch, I would literally sprint to my copy of "What to Expect When You're Expecting" to make sure that what I was feeling was normal. That's a far cry from my attitude this time, which is more often than not, "eh, it's probably normal" and going on about my day. (Speaking of which, I wonder where that book even is? Huh.)

I'm also starting to wonder if being pregnant is ever going to feel better this time around. I mean, physically I feel fine. I think it's more the mental aspect of "why the heck am I fat again?" that is having a hard time clicking. I need to get my ass up and on the treadmill in the mornings, but that stopped happening a few weeks ago when I got sick. I decided to give myself a week to fully recover, and am apparently still "recovering" 5 weeks later. Kevin keeps asking me why I don't just get up and work in the morning, then workout and shower later in the day. Simple. Showering and getting dressed for work in the morning signals to my brain that it's time to work. Much more so than dragging myself bleary-eyed and pajama-clad ever could. Plus, if I don't shower in the morning, then I probably won't find time to later in the day either (much like I won't find time to work out *sigh*). Then pretty soon I'd just stop showering all together. It's a slippery slope. Although I will admit to giving up on the dressing for work part lately. I've been in yoga pants and t-shirts with granny panties and no bra for the past week. Fine for sitting at home, not so fine when I need to run errands and forget what I'm wearing (or not wearing as the case my be) before leaving the house. But hey, I never claimed to be bringing sexy back this season. (Although I think my grannies do a nice job of holding it all in, which is much more sexy than seeing a thong sticking up over the top of the elastic band of my maternity jeans. Not that it's ever happened. I'm just guessing that it would be better.)

In addition to barely thinking about this pregnancy, including not even starting to set up the nursery or buying anything, including furniture, clothes, or diapers, I haven't even done a good job of taking pictures of myself this time around. Probably because I really don't want to know. Regardless, I FINALLY had Kevin take a picture (okay, 32 pictures) of me at 22 1/2 weeks.

This was shot #1:

I was personally thrilled with this one and was happy to call it a day after this one shot. Then Kevin pointed out that it's a little weird to be taking pregnancy belly shots while standing in front of my wine bar. Especially since there are multiple bottles of liquor about a foot away from my gut. He could have a point.

So shot #2 (fine, #32):

Yes, I realize that according to the look on my face, I look like I've spent a LOT more time than just those few seconds in front of my wine bar, but it was either this picture or one where my ass looks seriously ginormous. Yes, more so than here. I chose the lesser of the two evils. Plus, you get a teaser of Junior in his adorable camouflage pa-jay-jays. And, in case you're wondering, yes I did have to change out of my yoga pants and t-shirt in order to take this picture. Just one more of the sacrifices of having a blog.